Hitting A Wall & Test Taking Blues

This semester has felt like running into a brick wall. I have been going to school straight through since last spring without breaks. I am realizing that may help to cut down my overall time in school but it is killing me. I took 2 classes last Spring semester and then transitioned within a week to back-to-back Summer sessions. Then 3 classes in the fall, a J-term class that started the week after Fall finals and Spring 12' semester that overlapped J-term. Phew!

I noticed I have not been enjoying classes at all. I just have two because of the Computer Science class I took over J-term. So, as much as I really want to take summer classes to knock out more of my credits I just think I have to break for a time. I know Scott tells my I have to and my body-mind seems to be telling me the same thing.

With the slow march through Spring semester I have a huge Psychology test today. Of course, being the first of the semester always makes it harder. You don't know what to expect. The professors can give you handouts and study guides, but until you actually sit down and see how they truly set up their tests it's anyones guess. My biggest challenge with this test are the easy questions. Typically I like essay questions because it is easier for me to apply information I am learning then ramble off memorized facts. However, these are 6 extreme easy questions. The depth and amount of information needed in one essay alone is worth 2 pages of single spaced handwritten notes. Uhg!! So it has been a long week of studying and memorizing and praying that I can pass. I am so hard on myself, the idea of getting a B in the class is driving me insane. So far I have a 4.0 average since restarting after all these years and I just can't accept getting a B in Psychology.

Well, we will have to see. All I do now is count down the days to summer break and hopefully I can find a refreshing new start next fall. I know getting an art class back in my schedule will be helpful to reinvigorate me. Now back to studying!

Art Class 2011

This was a Ink Wash I had to do. I choose a
Georgia O'Keefe painting as my inspiration and used sea shells my boys collected from a trip we took to Myrtle Beach two years ago.

These four pictures were my Final Project for the class. I choose Interiors as my subject and Charcoal as my medium. I was blessed as a great friend of ours allowed me to use their house as my interior.

This was my first interior I attempted in class.

The class was very intense and demanding but I learned a lot, as it was my first classical drawing class. I was challenge by the teacher constantly, not always in a positive way, but it led me to improving with each day. I was so glad to have taken this class. I have more portraits but they are figure drawings of nude models so I will just keep them to myself. I would not want to post them without the approval of the models so they will just have to stay in my portfolio. I am really hoping to move on to painting next semester. We will see how things go.

Psychology 110

Last night's hour drive to class allowed for much pondering. The afternoon was a mad dash to get the boys homework finished and wrapped up, and then getting dinner in the oven before heading out the door. There is a half hour segment of time where my oldest son, Shaggy, holds down the fort until my husband arrives from work adding to the already building anxiety.

All that time driving left me feeling guilting about being a mom and a student. Am I doing the right thing? Am I abandoning my kids? Other moms just stay home and I am off finishing my education; am I a bad mom? Lovely thoughts like these bounced around my brain as I sat staring at the highway speeding by in front of me.

The night class schedule is new to me. I have been able to take classes while the boys are in school or online up until now. This semester I had to take two night classes and I can feel the guilt they are producing in me. I just have to reassure myself that this is a good thing for our entire family and it is a positive experience for my kids to see that education is important.

The class itself is a mixed bag of traditional students and Adult Education Program majors. The young kids in the class just talked about the dumbest things. All I heard last night was about horses and the the course load these kids have. Believe me as a mom returning to school they have nothing to complain about. I wish my only concern was how to fit riding classes into my study schedule.

*Just a little side note Wilson College has an equestrian program and veterinarian program so lots of the students who live on campus work with the horses to some degree.

So back to the class, the professor is a very typical Psychology Professor. I have had three Psych classes now and each prof seems to be the same: not personable or approachable and gruff. I have been really spoiled by nice profs so far, except for an Art professor last semester but I would have to explain her in an entire post by itself.

My drive home consisted of getting a phone call from my kids telling me goodnight and wanting to hear my voice before bed. It's strange to leave a class after learning about Freud and Phineas Gage and then hear you kids telling you all about The Biggest Loser and what I missed at home. I feel like I am straddling two worlds; a mom and a student. You never fully leave one or the other but carefully try to balance all the plates so they keep spinning and don't fall down.

Today will consist of exercising, finishing up my J-Term class that overlapped with my Spring Semester, and preparing for another afternoon and evening of running around as I head to my Education class tonight at a local High School. I just have to keep looking at the larger picture and the end goal. I will post some of my pictures from my Art class I took last semester. I was hoping to add a minor to my major in Art Studio but we will have to see if I can fit that all in to my already bursting schedule.

Applying for College

After all these years since I last attended College, I am sitting at my computer filling out an application to Wilson College. Yep, filling out the application and writing an essay. It seems all surreal. Time, effort, work and tears all culminating into an application. If I pursue Wilson College instead of my first option of PennState, I will actually be finishing school sooner.

WOw, the light is now shining at the end of the tunnel for me and it just seemed to far to even touch.

So now to see what the response will be. Life is always an unpredictable journey, but always a rush with enough adventure in it to fill scores of films!

Studying

Tonight I am studying for a math exam. Life has changes so much since my last blog post. Let me explain...

-I am currently enrolled as a Sophmore at my community college in the Education Degree path.

-I am still at home with my kids but we now officially have a teenager and one more closely on his brothers heels.

-My husband is starting to travel again for work blech!

-I am mentoring middle schoolers on my free time, which I am realizing I don't have any more of.

-I am doing 20 hrs of classroom observations at an Elementary school.

-I am doing art projects out the wahzoo because I thought it would be great to take an art class for fun.

-I still cook, clean and do everything else I did before.

- I teaching Wed. night at our church's Scrimage (a class for 3rd grade boys, what was I thinking and also volunteering as a buddy every other week for a child with special needs in Children's Ministry.

So needless to say my plate is full or to quote the Word, "Pressed down, shaken together and overflowing." I am not sure how I managed to get myself here but I am and I am bound and determined to make it out to the other side. So, here's to late nights of studying, lots of coffee, and long days of craziness!

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