I speak that directly to myself. I have always been harsh on the Disciples of Jesus and many of those in the Bible. I think to myself "Come on people, you have the Messiah standing right in front of you and you still don't get it!" or "Come on people didn't you just see that amazing miracle and you still doubt. If I lived back then I wouldn't have acted like that."Well, I guess after a few too many years of thinking or saying that to myself the Lord decided it was time to walk in their shoes for a while and see if my tune would change.
Right now I am in a time of stretching, unfolding, squeezing and refining with the Lord. Maturity in Christ is not about things getting easier for you but it is about going deeper. Alan Vincent, a missionary from India who now pastors in Texas, once said that mature Christians will begin to see their prayer requests go unanswered longer than when they were brand new Christains. It isn't because new, baby Christians have more faith or zeal but because being young in the Lord they need the "milk" of the Lord. They need to taste the things of the Lord and get an appetite for His love and faithfulness. As we mature our appetite changes and we eat more solid foods. God is seeking more of a intimate relationship with us not just a simple "give me", "what can I get from this" relationship. He is beginning to ask "How far will you press in? How deep will you go? How long will you travail for the things of the Kingdom?"
Mountain top experiences are wonderful and encounters with the Living God are amazing but going into the crushing depths of His very presence are more difficult. It takes sacrifice and a price must be paid...your very life for His.
I am in the boat right now on the seas of life. I have just witnessed the 5,000 being fed by only a child's meal but exhaustion has swept over me. The mountain top experience is not enough to sustain me, I need something more and I am too tired to see what it is. I know how the Disciples felt being in that storm. As the waves reach heights of 10-20 feet my small boat looks more like a child's play thing. Any minute now I know I will sink to the very bottom of the sea and drown.
Jesus however, sits on the mountain side and is observing the whole thing. Come to think of it He sent the storm. He orchestrated this time for me. I am in this storm but in his hands all at the same time. It's time for me to stop looking a the waves and start looking into His eyes. There I will find peace.
People over the years have made it to outer space and even the moon. Going high is difficult but manageable. Climbers summit Mt. Everest, Pike's Peak and Mt. McKinley every year, but what about our ocean? Do you realize it is the last unexplored frontier of our world. In reality we have not been able to go very deep in respect to how deep the ocean really is. The pressure is too great. Submarines can only go so far without being crushed.
That's what the Lord is looking for...people willing to go into the crushing depths of His presence. Those who are willing to lose their lives to gain them. That is where He is taking me. I feel the pressure building. I don't think at times I can survive. However, God has promised me I will make it if I just don't give up. It's time for us to go deep. It's time to get uncomfortable and vulnerable with God. I take back everything I ever said about the Disciples or others in the Bible. Those are the individuals that went into the depths and came out changed forever. They became the history makers. Are we willing to be a generation that is more concerned with going deeper than sitting on the mountain tops?
2 comments:
Good word Becky. He is wooing you!
Livin', you're amazing. I honestly have to wonder how much wisdom has the Lord deposited in you? I know it's a lot!! :) I had to put myself in their shoes last year when we were being stretched. I kept picturing the Egyptians getting closer and hearing the roar of the Red Sea. I actually felt myself panicking, wondering if I was going to drown or just be killed. I have to remind myself that it's a lot easier for us to "see" because we have the "Book". I'm so grateful for the men & women of the Bible. I have so much to learn from them. :) Continuing to pray for you friend. *hugs*
Post a Comment