"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times" -Charles Dickens

I know I used this title for my face book status line but that's where we are right now. Dickens is another highly favorite author of mine. I just broke down and took the Tale of Two Cities out of the library to read again. I love this quote.

As a parent you can be your child's hero and enemy all in the same moment. You get the smiles and laughs and then 'poof' the tears start flowing and they hate you. I thought for some naive reason we would escape some of the pre-teen/teenage drama because we have boys but was I completely mistaken.

Don't get me wrong we have been experiencing some great things in our home surrounding our boys. Rocker and Shaggy have been devouring the Bible at night on their own. They have been stepping up more in boldness and confidence about their beliefs. Just this past weekend our church had the Alter Team Ministry pray for those who wanted to be filled with the Holy Spirit and/or speaking in tongues and all three of the boys (who are filled with both) got up and ministered with us. It was awesome!!

The boys are actually excited about my internship I will be starting in Sept. and want to participate as much as they can. I mean last night our 10 & 9 year old asked to participate in the Ministries Staff Bible Study that Scott and I were asked to join in on. We did not even think about asking them but they volunteered on their own. Wow, God is moving.

Then you have the moments as a mom or dad where you could literally beat your head against a wall for 2 hours. Brothers picking on each other and irritating the crap out one another. The constant needs of a family always lurking in the shadows of your day. I don't think walking in fullness of Christ means that life will be perfect but as Charles Dickens so aptly put it you will experience "...the best of times [and] the worst of times". I no longer live in survival mode but I feel as though I have broken into "thrivival" mode (if Shakespeare can make up words so can I). My family and I are thriving in the Lord.

If I let my expectations of what "thriving" looks like get in the way, then I will kick back into striving and surviving. I was asking the Father about that very thing yesterday. I have been talking to some moms in the early years of parenting and everyone of them are struggling with survival. I asked the Father "Can even moms of young ones thrive in God? Or will we always just survive?" The answer was interesting...He asked me some questions.

• Did you thrive or survive as a young mom?
• What helps you thrive now, what's the key now?
• What do you expect or think of when you hear the word thrive?

Hmmmmmmmm? As a young mom I believe I walked the line of survival and thriving constantly. I never really got my foot on one side of the fence for too long. I can see looking back it had to do personally with my healing. When I was seeking the Lord and moving forward with His truth I could plant my feet firmly on the "thrivival" side, but when I began to depend on my own understanding and my own expectations of how I felt things should look I jumped back onto the barren wastelands of survival. I see now that when my views and thoughts are constantly being taken before the Lord for truth I can peacefully live and thrive as a mom. That doesn't mean at all that my life is perfect. I just have come to that truth and peace it doesn't have to, to thrive in Christ. The key is dependence on God and His view of life.

Right now I take each moment as it comes. I wish I had done that more when my kids were younger. I got so caught up at times in the years to come or the ministry of the future that I missed what was staring me right in the face...life. I don't have a 5 year plan. God can do whatever He wants with me whenever He wants me too. For example I have peace about taking on this internship for a year but God is in control so after this year I will find out what He wants me to do then.

Shaggy and Rocker are both hitting puberty right now and with it, it brings many ups and downs to our family but we are learning to ride the ride. It's hard for young boys (and girls I just don't have any) to become adults. We have great days and then there are those days we completely crash and burn into a fiery wreckage. Does it mean we are not thriving? No! We are because I know this is just the process of a boy becoming a man and we are to patiently walk with them through this. Some days we can just sit back and enjoy watching these guys become the men of God they were created to be and other days we pray a lot and wipe away the tears.

If you feel as though right now you are in survival mode I encourage you to begin to ask the Lord about you expectations of life right now. Ask Him to show you ways in which you and your entire family can thrive. It may come at a cost. Maybe you have to give up so extra things you are involved in to make sure you are not too stretched. Too many things on the calendar can bring on survival mode very quickly. Maybe you just need a picture from the Lord about how He sees your life. Thriving depends solely on your dependence on God where as Survival is all about dependence on self. Believe me ladies I did survival mode and dependence on self, its not any fun at all. Choose to depend on God and begin to thrive, just realize and accept in the midst of even thriving you will still have the good, the bad and the ugly but you get to see it all through the eyes of the Father.